fatigue, fatigue, fatigue

fatigue. a new word indeed for me. bukan dalam artian saya tidak pernah mengalaminya sebelumnya, tapi dalam artian secara harafiah, saya baru mengenal istilah dalam bahasa inggris tersebut. dan rasanya? hmmm.. perfect.

menemukan kata fatigue dalam vocabulary bahasa inggris sama rasanya seperti menemukan kata abysmal, yang akhirnya saya abadikan menjadi yahoo id saya. norak? you may say so. atau silahkan berpikir bahwa saya memiliki kosa kata terbatas dalam bahasa inggris. be my guest :)

To think of it, what grows the feeling is that i am feeling the actual 'fatigue' right now. fatigue of the new job that i have. fatigue of the extra smart and perfectionist boss i have right now. fatigue to the routine i'm doing right now. fatigue of this and that and this and that.... (by the way, am i using the word correctly in the sentence? i'm feeling a little bit like benjamin in sinetron when he's using the word "tukang insinyur"... haha.. what a big joke)

and the weird thing is that this whole 'fatigue' thing (and i ask again, am i using it correctly?) is not caused by how things turn bad in my life. it is actually cause by how perfect it seemed. i do get everything that i ever wanted in this job. and the result? i'm fatigue just to keep it running smoothly, for i dont want it to change.